Many people believe that Stegosaurus is a very stupid creature. Nothing could be further from the truth, it is an extremely contemplative creature and having two brains, as is well known, it can take a great deal of time to reach a conclusion to any given problem, as all matters have to be discussed at great length by both brains. 

If for instance you should say "Walkies!" to your stegosaurus nothing will happen, this leads some to the conclusion that it is thick or deaf, in fact what happens is this. 

First it hears the words and decides what you mean, in this case that you want it to take you for a walk. Then it considers the implications of what you are saying, such as is it raining? Will you get fed up and want to go home after only twelve miles like you did last time? Is it too near lunch time and so on, it then passes all this information to brain two to find out what it thinks about all this. 

Brain two is as we all know, at the other end of the creature, that is quite some way from brain one and consequently communication is slow. 

Brain two considers the information from brain one and decides that it wants to know more, in this case it could be, where does he want to go? Do I have to wear that silly lead? What is in it for me and so on. 

Brain one, having received the request for more information then sends a message back to brain two, such as "Search me buddy", or "What are you complaining about, it is my end that has to wear the stupid lead". 

After this exchange of all relevant information Stegosaurus then goes into its decision making routine, it might go something like this.   

     Brain one - I don't want to go.   

     Brain two - nor do I, it was bad enough last time.   

     Brain one - If we don't go we might hurt his feelings.   

     Brain two - Then don't tell him!   

     Brain one - Good idea, why didn't I think of that.   

     Brain two - Good, I'm glad that is settled, now where were we before the interruption.

Feeding of Stegosaurus is carried out by placing the food in front of it. No spoken word is needed, when it sees the food it will eat, this is automatic so there is no need for brain one to consult brain two. 

If you should be foolish enough to place the food in another room and shout "Lunch" you will cause brain one to contact brain two, usually with disastrous results. 

It has to be remembered that brain one controls the front legs while brain two controls the back legs, this works well as long as the creature does not get too excited, by for instance, some fool shouting "Lunch". 

There are several possibilities here, one is that brain one will forget to tell brain two, the result being that the front legs go while the back legs do not, this is very bad for the carpet. It may be that brain one does tell brain two to go, but not which way, this can result in the front legs going left and the back legs going right, resulting in one poor Stegosaurus being tied in a knot.

Another possibility might go something like this.  

     Brain one - lets go, it's lunch time.  

     Brain two - Take it away Buddy!  

     Brain one - Tally-Ho. Oops! There is something wrong.  

     Brain two - Get a move on up there I'm starving.  

     Brain one - Help! The world has gone sideways!  

     Brain two - Did you start off on your right leg again?  

     Brain one - I think I might have done, did you?  

     Brain two - I think we have fallen over!      

Another reason for not getting your Stegosaurus excited is his habit of wagging his tail, which as you know is equipped with four very large spikes! 

The tail, like the back legs, is controlled by brain two while the eyes, like the front legs, are controlled by brain one; this means that there is not the slightest chance that Stegosaurus will know what, or even who, is in the way of his tail when he starts to wag it, indeed brain one may not even know that the tail has been wagged until a week after the event.